December 6, 2012

• Hermit: Revisited

  What is the compulsion forcing me to exist in this world? I don't get it. I've always wanted to be a hermit, this blog is evidence to that. And I have all the reason in the world to give up and retire to a cave and waste away with just my thoughts. I have a pivotal tragedy that sticks with me every hour of every day. My one hope at hope extinguished. So why do I keep trying? Why do I push on towards moderate success? 

  Part of it is because moderate success is so easy. The rest of the world is that stupid. I see that. It frustrates me to not see a certain level of competence, and I reach that without my desire.

  But that's it. I don't fit into society's norms. I'm probably clinically insane. I can't stand everything most of the time. But I haven't taken the plunge towards that "crazy guy in the neighborhood" lifestyle. I reckon that's because the crazy guy is usually one of those morons that couldn't reach an average level of societal production. Maybe the instances of my type aren't as populous. I don't know.

  So many years of thinking, and all I can still say is, I don't know.

  • 7:46 pm
  • Comments Off